I've Come to a Sheep in the Road and I need to Make a Decision

I don't know if you call what I have, "a mid-life crisis" but whatever it is, it feels urgent. I used to think that I needed continuous change, my childhood had ingrained some deep need to always be changing my situation, so as an adult I sought out that change and intentionally looked for something to disrupt the norm and thereby shuffle in some sort of change. I used to think that, before I was married for going on 17 years and worked at the same job for 15 years and lived in the same city for 12 years and so on and so on. Now it's pretty fucking obvious I'm OK with things staying the same...except, now I want to disrupt all of the stability I have and make a, quite frankly, unneeded and unnecessary change. I've walked this weird line for so long, I grew up with such instability the one thing I always wanted to be stable, to have a family and kids and a job and a house and just be "OK", not even exceptional, just "OK". I didn't look for excitement or thrills,  just "safe". Well I've accomplished that and now, I kinda want to take some risks which is hilarious because those risks could fuck up all of this stability I've busted my ass to gain over the last 2-decades. In addition, I'm responsible for 5 other people's entire lives. If I fuck up and lose it all, THEY lose it all too and they didn't actually decide to take any risks. I could easily sit tight, do nothing, be happy that I have come so far in my life and continue on the current path, maybe take a yoga class, learn not to be so antsy, so unsettled. I'm not sure if that would work or help though, I don't know if I can know what will help or work until I start trying different shit to see what happens, but with those attempts comes the risk of things not working out OR actually working out and thereby ushering in drastic and dramatic change. This is all very scary and although they always say you should confront your fears they never mention the wife and four kids that not only don't have a say in said confrontations, they don't really get to opt out of the consequences of the results of my decisions. Fuck. I'd like to sign up for the guaranteed results no risk happy ending life now please. Thanks!